Owning the Pain (and other childhood scars)

I grew up with a bunch of religious taboos and social rules to follow. My parents were consumed with appearances and fitting in. By the time I got to high school, I was pretty messed up. Confused. Ignorant. A normal teen, growing up, without Internet, back in the day.

Apparently, I’m one of the last boomers. My parents were part of the Silent Generation. I guess the silent part was for realz because I never even heard of the Silent Generation until I looked up the folks to see where they fit in. Silence is golden I guess.

I miss my parents. Maybe they helped mess me up in the head. They caused some pain, but they didn’t do it on purpose. By and large, they did a pretty good job for their day. I mean, people didn’t really have a clue back then about parenting. You just did what your parents did. Funny how once you become a parent, you can see it from your parent’s perspective, and it suddenly makes a lot more sense. You know, all that shit that didn’t make sense back then, it’s pretty clearly stupid as fuck now.

I tried really hard to blame mom and dad for a lot of pain that was clearly my own fault. It took time to grow up and own the responsibility. It’s fine to acknowledge the damage that others cause us. But ultimately it’s up to us what we do with that pain. We do best when we own it and choose not to be defined by it, but rather defined by how we overcame it. Own the pain by owning the triumph.

The pain just keeps coming, and as you get older, each day gets a bit more full of pain. But also more full of joy. I find more joy in everything I do. Peeling through the skin of bitter pain to savor the joyous fruits, makes the fruit all the more sweet. ~jg

Jamie Gray

Authors Note: All opinions expressed here are just that: opinions. If you don’t like mine, I probably won’t like yours either. Let’s just nod, and walk away. Maybe come back with solutions instead of opinions. Because of the two, only solutions actually matter.

More: https://jamiegraymusic.com/wordpress/2022/01/owning-the-pain-and-other-childhood-scars/